It's all about me

Today I don't give a damn about anyone but myself. You can keep your platitudes and your pleasantries; your attention and your concern; your words of comfort and advice and empathy. They will do no good here. My emotions are amok. At one moment I want to wail and burst into tears, and at the next I want to attack and scream about how unfair everything is.

And no, I don't want to be positive, and think about a brighter tomorrow. All I can see - all I can concentrate on - is how RIGHT NOW SUCKS. I want to revel in the muck that my life seems to be, and I want to feel sorry for myself. And I don't want to listen to the logic that tries to tell me that none of this will help.

My mind is closed - a tunnel vision of dark thoughts. Rainbows and fresh flowers and merry melodies seem like fantasy fiction - impossible, and hard to believe. And anyone else's good news is unwelcome. I feel evil and dark and loathsome. A wicked witch in a stinking bog.


So be warned. Today it's all about me. And none of it is good.